6:00 a.m., Wednesday, Nanjing, China

If you are looking for info on Gaoyou - here are two links that are full of interesting facts on the area that Jill is at:
Half the Sky in Gaoyou
Gaoyou - Wikipedia

Here is Jill's post to me today - it is a long one....


Hello everyone,
We are doing well in China. I haven’t been able to write as much, because I have Jiliang now. She is also very enamored by my computer. I am shocked that she is letting me type now. On the first day, she was comforted by the video of her orphanage staff on video. Now, she likes to see pictures of herself, Mama, China, Baba and T.J. (da gu gu?). Every time I get the computer out, she thinks it is for her.

She is like a typical 3 year old, testing me and vying for my attention. When she wants my attention, she plays her Ling doll. She presses the buttons and waits for me to say the Chinese words. She gets upset when I say no to her. She cries, and I try to keep a straight face and point to what I want her to do and make sure she follows through. Yesterday, she threw something on the floor, next to the trash, and I told her to pick it up. She wouldn’t do it, so I gently did a hand over hand with her and said, “Yeah, nice job.” I know that was to get my attention, because she is an utter neat freak.

When Jiliang woke up on our first morning together, I was getting my hair ready in the bathroom. She ran out of bed and ran into the bathroom. She just looked at me, like, “Okay, it is you.” I wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing. She went to bed in the butterfly pajamas that T.J. colored for her. When she woke up, she had blue hands. I looked at them, and she had a look on her face like she was going to get reprimanded for getting dirty.

I put her new red coat on her. She let me. She cried when I put her red hat on her. Then, she followed me to the door and down the elevator. She barely ate at breakfast – maybe one bite. When we were in the cab, I asked Fred to tell her that she was staying with me. I think that he was confused.

At the Civil Affairs Office, we arrived before the Gaoyou staff got there. I could feel Jiliang’s heart beating through all of her layers of clothes and coat. The place was full today. Everyone was very nice. The Gaoyou staff was shocked at her happy disposition with me. The ladies were afraid to let her see them, and I encouraged them it was okay to enter. They said that Jiliang is not usually comfortable and open with strangers. She backed away from THEM today. They each wanted to say goodbye to her. It was very sweet. One of the ladies told me that Jiliang was afraid to go with her, and when she held her, she wanted me. They explained that she was staying with me, and then she warmed up to them. They said, “wow” when they saw how she was sitting happily with me. It was obvious that they really loved her and wanted the best for her. The Orphanage Director gave me a book about adoption from Gaoyou, which I wanted to buy; however it is in Chinese. It was sweet. He also gave me a postcard book from places around Gaoyou. I will cherish that. I gave them their gifts and a specially wrapped gift of Cathy Luick’s handmade Jiliang earrings. They were touched that I had a special gift for her.
They told me that the two marks on her stomach area were from a recent heart monitor she had before they brought her to me. They also told me that she loves picture books and loves to ride a bike. They were so happy that I bought Jiliang a bike! I have to laugh, because it was one of the few things that I knew about her and bought it to make her feel welcomed. If they only knew how hard the wait was.

I did discover that she had NOT had any heart surgery in China. I thought she had a partial intervention or stint. I also found out that her bald patch is part of her birthmark or scar. Her hair is not going to grow back. I will buy some hat for now. However, I spend the afternoon with her without any hat, and got a lot of unnecessary stares, glares and smiles. That makes me sad for her. You want to spare your children any unnecessary stares and pain. Scott is totally okay with it. He said, “Let’s just worry about taking care of her heart first, and then we will worry about the hair.”

On day one, she didn’t eat much. Yesterday, she didn’t eat much at breakfast, before the adoption. After the adoption process, she was told that she was mine. She has been eating and drinking non-stop. She ate with chopsticks at lunch and I was so shock I started to cry and laugh at the same time. We had the embarrassing hands-down-the-pants moment at the 5 star lunch buffet. I don’t blame her. She insisted on dressing herself, but had her underwear and leggings on backwards under her pants. Then, she picked her nose at the table and I showed her how to use a tissue. I showed her how to “blow” her nose in the hotel. At the restaurant, they gave her a highchair, but I insisted she NOT have the tray. I am probably breaking a ton of social rules. That doesn’t seem appropriate to eat off of a try. She made no mess at the table! What got on the table, she cleaned up immediately. She used every napkin at the table to touch up her face. She also wanted to learn how to use a toothpick.

In the afternoon, we went for a walk around the block. It is safe her, but there is not much to see. Each building has a guard, and there are police everyone. After we went around the block, I am assuming it is because the entire street we on is nothing but banks. There is no shopping nearby. Fred took us to the grocery store the day before. He told us we could walk there if we needed something. He also mentioned that the streets in China were kind of “like playing chicken”. It’s true. With a child, I have no interest in playing chicken with cars, bikes, mopeds or busses. He also mentioned that traffic has no direction. Drivers go the opposite way on the road. Drivers cut up what appears to be sidewalks and skinny one-lane alleys (but they make 2 lanes). I feel like I am in Chicago (minus the language barrier), not Nanjing in China. I am truly a country girl and have never been a city girl. My sister Leah reminded me of our Boston trip. At first, I was so disappointed in Boston, and by the end of the trip, I missed it, and looked back and wished I had enjoyed it more.

As for Jiliang, she has been calling me, “Mama” since day one. She is sweet, funny and mischievious. I am having trouble getting her to say any English words. She cries when she wants something or can’t do something. Unfortunately, it is the same cry for everything, so often it is something as simple as her pant leg being bunched.

Yesterday, she had an upset stomach or bathroom issue after she woke up from a nap that I made her take against her will. I am assuming that she overate or ate some Chinese food at lunch that her little body was not used to. It could have been stress too. I gave her a bath to calm her down. That is what I learned from T.J. She calmed right down. However, her little toes had a purplish tint to them. That is the heart condition. It scared me. Luckily, she is totally potty-trained. She has never had any bathroom accident, and I think she would be mortified if she did. She is fine now. However, I think that she has croup. I found out that there is a clinic here in the building. I might take her there. However, I know that croup is benefited by fresh air. She gets a physical too, in Guangzhou, so I might wait it out, but I don’t want there to be any delays in getting her home.

Yesterday, we had the bathwater back up in the floor, and they came to snake it out. In this building, you cannot let the bath water out fast or fill it up too much.  In the evening, the most God-aweful smell was coming from that drain at 8:00 p.m. It smelled like vomit. I called because I was afraid it would back up. They put a chemical in the drain and were so nice about it. They probably thought I was crazy. It was warm outside, so I had the window open. Jenny, the hotel person, who is sweet as can be, asked if the baby would be okay with the window open. In China, they layer kids like crazy and worry about the babies getting “chilled”.
This morning, we are sight-seeing. Fred explained to me yesterday that typically only babies and toddlers use a stroller. I don’t think that he understands that she has a heart condition. Yesterday, when we walked around the block, I picked her up so she wouldn’t step in something wet. I heard her panting softly, like a child with asthma, minus the wheezing. If we do a lot of sight-seeing today, we will take it easy, and try to get a stroller. If not, I will carry her, because she is so light. If it’s too much, we will call it a day.

Today, my little Chinese alarm clock woke me up at 6:00 a.m. God Bless her. She whimpered, like, “I don’t want to go back to bed”,  so I said, “Let’s get up.” She started her morning drinking a bottle of water. Then, she colored in her Elmo coloring book and blew bubbles out the window.
For Scott, stock up on bubbles, oranges, bananas, pears, Ramen noodles, Skittles and hats or cloth headbands. She hates the hard headbands I got her. I think they hurt her head.

As for me, I am looking forward to getting out of this hotel. And honestly, I am homesick. I miss my husband, I really miss T.J. dearly, and I miss the comforts of my own home, even though I often call it a shack. It is home. I can’t wait to get Jiliang home. She is going to love T.J. “Mama”, she says, as she just peeled a banana herself. She is so self-sufficient. I can’t wait until we can talk to each. Hopefully it will help having T.J. around. However, she does sound cute in Chinese. I told the orphanage lady that she talks a lot in Chinese and she was surprised and said, “She only talks to people she is familiar with”. That melted my heart, of course. I will leave you with this: She sounds like the little girl in Monsters, Inc., who I always thought had the cutest little girl voice.

Jill :)